Safely Broken

As I pondered the deficiencies of my love life this week, a truth bomb smashed into me. I am safely broken. I was in the middle of writing down thoughts on men and why they hold their feelings back and I was forced to look into a mirror. One of my observations was that older men who have been wounded in love find it easier to carry on in their safe place...work. There they are safe because they know what is expected of them and can execute efficiently.

They know they are broken and choose to play it safe. Before the words were even out of my soul, my eyes were opened to the same in myself. Only I don't hide in my work. I hide somewhere else but it's the same idea, I hide from risk. No matter how much I feel or love, I find a way to sabotage it so I can stay SAFE. I fight for my safety more than I fight for love. Why? Because I've been broken by love. Born on Valentine's Day and love is the killer in my story!

Yet, I don't want to be alone. I want to have adventures, pursue dreams, and experience love again. I think I have my answer for me...if I want to experience a healthy relationship I have to fight for love more than I fight for my safety or else I will die safely broken.