The Day After the Day After

Life can be a shyster. It can remove something out of your life with no prior warning. In fact, it can happen so stealthily that you only see it when you look back. Crafty, huh? Maybe that's where the term "hindsight is 20/20" came from. Everything is in focus and obvious when you look back.

I think that just happened to me. That pesky relationship that's remained docked in the unknown since October. Round two and seven months later, my heart was tired. It was weary of beating for someone who talked about adventures and time together but never came through. Tired of hearing about loathsome dinners and outings with others who got the privilege to be with him because of proximity. Truth be told, they probably would rather be somewhere else but because he's the boss, they go and endure the time.

Meanwhile, miles away, and sometimes not, there's this heart pining to have time with him just because of him. Because he makes her laugh. Makes her dream. Makes her want to grow. Makes her want commitment again. Isn't that the way it always works? The heart that deserves the attention is denied it. The posers that get it because of circumstance or proximity, get it all.

Finally, I had to stand up and say to myself that I'm worth more than that. In fact in my dating history, the men who either dumped me or I dumped them always came back. Every single one of them. They got back out there in the lacking dating pool, realized what they lost, and came back. Second chances should not be taken lightly because they are the last chance.

I guess I can chalk it up to fairy tales. I want one therefore I conjure it up in my mind. At the end of the day, if you want someone to be happy, you let them go so they can be. And I hope he is happy. More than anything :-)